


I'm drowning in the night

by FallOutBean



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Based on a The Weeknd Song, F/F, but not really they're just idiots, famous!emily, star-crossed lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:00:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25764049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FallOutBean/pseuds/FallOutBean
Summary: Emily is famous and all that jazz. Aubrey is only several steps away from being a hermit leading the lodge. It seems as if there's no way they could combine their lives, but in the end, it hurts too much not to try.
Relationships: Emily Junk/Aubrey Posen
Comments: 11
Kudos: 33





	I'm drowning in the night

**Author's Note:**

> This fic (and its title) is based on [Blinding lights](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NRXx6U8ABQ) by The Weeknd and just materialized in my head one day; although the inspiration to use a Junksen pairing was definitely inspired by [L82dparty](https://archiveofourown.org/users/L82dparty/pseuds/L82dparty), who's the biggest Junksen fan I came across! ;) Oh, and PP3 only exists for the aquarium scene. Period.

Sitting on one of the benches in front of the Brooklyn Aquarium, Emily lets her view drift over the large building’s form that can be perceived in the dark. Only a few people walk along at this time on a workday; the traffic is lower than usual and it’s almost quiet (at least to her ear; New York isn’t called ‘the city that never sleeps’ for nothing).

_\- Sin city’s cold and empty -_

Much time has passed since her performance with her Bellas here, with the old Bellas visiting them. She thinks about how uncomfortable it was when she recognized that her old squad thought it was a reunion, while they had only been invited for moral support.

Emily smirks at the memory and takes the scrunchie out of her hair. Her hair comes down and she shakes it bit so it falls gently on her shoulders.

She remembers the style of their costumes; golden jackets showered with golden sequins. She remembers how careless her jacket was thrown to the ground that night. Not because the performance wasn’t good, not because the piece of clothing didn’t mean much to her. No; because it belonged to the mass of unnecessary layers of fabric that kept her from feeling every inch of Aubrey’s skin with her body.

_[While her Bellas sang the bridge leading to the refrain of ‘sit still look pretty’, Emily watched the crowd. Watched_ her _. Aubrey pulled at her Bella scarf as if it were a hot summer day and the piece of clothing dammed the cool air reaching her neck. Emily could feel the older one’s eyes roaming up and down her body; following her every move. It felt good. There was hunger in Aubrey’s eyes as Fat Amy said something probably ridiculous to the blonde._

_Maybe Emily took the chance to slide her skirt a bit higher._

_Later that night they stumbled into her hotel room, Aubrey pushing her into the wall next to the door._

_“Let’s see if you can sit still and look pretty for me while I go down on you.”_

_A few seconds later Aubrey led her to the bed; got down on her knees and positioned herself between Emily’s thighs. The skirt was pushed up higher, but Emily’s hands quickly rushed to its button to open it. She lifted her butt to take it off; not her most graceful move, but the thought of keeping it on for just a second longer made her wanting to scream. Aubrey watched her amused, with the green of her eyes barely visible around the darkness revealing her arousal._

_Finally, when also her panties were gone, they stopped for a moment as Aubrey just studied her body._

_“You’re so beautiful.”_

_Then Aubrey lowered her mouth and her tongue touched Emily._

_She could try looking pretty. Sitting still? Not so much.]_

Emily shudders when the memory hits her and she opens their text conversation on her phone, just to stare at the last messages they’ve exchanged. It’s been two weeks since the last lines; birthday wishes. That day, it had appeared Aubrey wanted to write more, the three dots under her name disappearing and re-appearing a few times. But nothing ever came.

_\- I’m going through withdrawals -_

The display turns black and she activates it again, maneuvering her thumb to the input field.

 **Emily:** I’ve been tryna call

It only takes a few minutes, despite the late hour, till she gets an answer.

 **Aubrey:** I know.

 **Emily:** What if everything we’ll ever say to each other is that it’s not the right time?

_\- I’ve been on my own for long enough -_

Thrice they’d hooked up. The first time was at the lodge with Emily being a freshman; clumsy, young, and innocent. Aubrey was nothing of that. She was confident; frightening even. And so, so hot.

_[The early morning sun fell into the small hut which belonged to the blonde camp leader then, shining on the dust in the air and making it look like tinsel floating through the room. Aubrey got up and slowly collected her clothes which were neatly folded on a chair._

_“You need to hurry back so the others won’t get suspicious. I doubt Amy will ever let this go if she finds out.”_

_Emily swallowed the lump in her throat. “I suppose you’re right.”_

_When Aubrey saw the flash of hurt in the younger one’s face, she sat on the edge of the bed. “Look… I really enjoyed last night. I don’t regret anything, just so you know. Is… is that something you would agree on?”_

_Emily nodded, wetting her lips._

_“Good.” Aubrey smiled and stroked the brunettes hair. “Come on cutie, they’ll wake up soon.”]_

_\- Maybe you can show me how to love -_

The second time was right after worlds. The after party had been in full swing and Beca had just confessed her love for Chloe by screaming it out loud, drunkenly waving the trophy filled with the famous _jiggle juice_ above her head, when Aubrey’s eyes had found hers. One bite on her lip later and they’d been in her hotel room, eagerly shedding their clothes.

_[“Have I told you that you were amazing tonight?” Aubrey asked between kisses she planted on Emily’s neck, all tongue and teeth. Emily had to keep herself from begging Aubrey to devour her._

_“You did.”_

_“I’ll gladly do it again. You were absolutely amazing. You voice turns me on so much, you know that?”_

_“Good to know… You want me to sing for you?” She managed to answer in a rather cocky way._

_Aubrey’s hand slid into her pants and Emily sharply inhaled._

_“Oh, I’ll_ make _you sing for me, don’t worry.”]_

The last time was here in New York. The light in her hotel room had been reflected on her jacket on the ground and had bathed the room in an ocean of little warm dots, like a disco ball.

_\- You don't even have_ _to do too much; you can turn me on with just a touch -_

That last time felt different. At first it was pure passion, a raw need to be close to each other again after a long time; everything felt too slow and too quick at the same time. Nothing was enough. When the first rounds had satisfied their need, it had turned into something warm, with more comfort. Like making love and… reassurance.

Safety?

Emily takes a sip of her beer and chuckles.

_\- No one’s around to judge me -_

How much worth was this safety when it had only lasted till the next day?

 _I still have the lodge,_ Aubrey had said.

 _I’ll be traveling a lot_ , Emily had said.

The phone vibrates in her hand.

 **Aubrey:** It’s just never been the right time. I’m afraid it’ll never be.

Emily exhales and ponders if she should play along or just cut to the chase. It feels like wasted time, and she’s tired of that. She chooses the latter.

**Emily:** Do you want me?

 **Aubrey:** You know I do.

 **Emily:** No, do you want to be with me?

It takes a bit longer till the next message comes through. Emily swaps her legs and downs the beer.

**Aubrey:** You know it’s not that easy. I recall you’re busy being famous and I have the lodge.

 **Emily:** I’m not asking if it’s easy, I’m asking if you want to be with me

 **Aubrey:** Does it matter?

 **Emily:** It’s the only thing that matters

\- _I can’t see clearly when you’re gone -_

Emily gets off the bench and puts the bottle in a nearby trash can. She approaches the vehicle that dropped her off earlier and now waits for her return.

“Get me to my plane, please.”

The driver looks at her through the rear mirror, nods and starts the engine. They take the fastest route to the little private airport where ‘her’ jet is; some kind of gift by her label (an item of loan, really) as long as she’s bonded by her contract that is. They gave it to her when she finished her second album, which went through the roof and brought them tons of dollars. _‘A shit load of money, dude!’_ as Beca would say.

It’s nice, stylish and most of all a prestige object. It’s lonely on most days, even if Beca’s with her sometimes. As her producer, Beca’s not really obliged to accompany her; she has a few other clients and likes to stay in New York with Chloe, living a domestic life. Sure, Emily has her team, Trish and Kay and Mara, who are something close to friends, but it’s not half as fulfilling. She enjoys it more to stay with Beca and Chloe every now and then. They’re family. And the idea of going on tour is a lot more romantic than actually going, she had realized soon enough.

Emily goes through the short boarding process and sits down in her favorite seat. The pilot looks tired, but assures her that she’s perfectly able to fly them safely to their location. A string of vibrations in her pocket demands her attention.

**Aubrey:** I live in the woods around Atlanta. I own a small house and prefer to stay in, instead of going out. I’d chose cooking and game night over drinking and parties every single time. I hate places with a lot of people.

 **Aubrey:** I’m lactose intolerant. I probably have a lot of daddy issues. I plan to get a dog. I snore when I have a cold. I’m a borderline control freak (according to my therapist, whatever).

 **Aubrey:** What if you realize that I’m not worth it?

Pain surges through Emily’s chest, bottling up at her throat.

**Emily:** You’re worth everything

 **Emily:** You’ve always been

She turns her phone off then, at least for the next thirty minutes. She’ll turn it on again after they’ve reached their travel height.

When Emily opens her eyes the next time, they’re already descending and she figures she must have fallen asleep. The jet touches down and gets into parking position.

“Do you need me to get you a private car, Ms. Junk?” her pilot asks as she comes out of the cockpit and Emily smiles a smile that doesn’t reach her eyes while shaking her head no.

“No, thank you, I’ll just get an Uber.”

“Are you sure? It’s 3 a.m.”

“Yes, thank you. I’m really sorry for keeping you up so late. There’s… something I really need to do; sorry that I pulled you into my mess.”

“It’s fine Ms. Junk, don’t worry. I hope you get everything sorted out.”

“I hope so, too.”

Emily exits the plane and turns her phone on, which greets her with several messages from Aubrey. She ignores them for now and orders an Uber to the airport. After further transportation is organized, she sighs and opens the notifications.

**Aubrey:** How can you be so sure?

 **Aubrey:** What if I hold you back?

 **Aubrey:** Em?

 **Aubrey:** Are you still there?

\- _I’m blinded by the lights -_

**Emily:** Just answer the question for once, do you want to be with me?

The Uber arrives and she slips in, sunglasses and cap on her head. The driver doesn’t even give her a spare look through the mirror, but asks if the goal’s still the same she gave earlier. The car moves and it’s a good thing Emily has her travel bag with her she realizes, as her mouth gets dryer and dryer the closer she gets to her destination.

_\- I'm running out of time, cause I can see the sun light up the sky -_

**Aubrey:** If I pretend I don’t, it doesn’t hurt as much.

 **Aubrey:** So, no. I don’t.

The car reaches a trail and the trip gets bumpy. Emily hears the driver huffing.

“You could’ve told me it’s going to be an off-road drive; the car is not exactly made for this.”

Emily ignores him. He could’ve said something when she gave him the destination and she has no time for his lamentations. She needs to be there as quick as possible. She needed to be there months ago. Years maybe.

_\- I'm just coming back to let you know, I could never say it on the phone, I will never let you go this time -_

_Finally_ , they stop in front of a small house. A jeep is parked on the side of it and the windows are dark, except for a small one on the first floor.

“Thank you. Here, for your inconveniences.”

Emily takes out a hundred dollars cash and lets them fall to the passenger seat. She already paid the trip via credit card but she couldn’t care less. When she stands in front of the door, she takes out her phone again.

**Emily:** Open your door

 **Aubrey:** Is this some kind of metaphor?

 **Emily:** No, literally open your door, it gets cold in this forest of yours

Emily can hear movement inside the house and the light on the ground level gets turned on. Silence follows and she imagines Aubrey standing in her hallway, pondering if this is crazy and if she misinterpreted the texts they’ve exchanged. Emily smiles when a key is turned and the door is opened, hesitantly.

Aubrey looks at her like a deer in headlights. She wears pajamas and thick socks. Her hair is tousled and under her glasses, her eyes are puffy and red. It’s clear she cried.

“What are you doing here, Em?”

“I’m in love with you.”

Aubrey’s face lights up quickly, but then she scrunches her eyebrows, waiting for Emily to elaborate.

“I need a night lamp to sleep. I hate charade. I like to cook, but I’m impatient, so you’d need to teach me carefully. I love animals and have the strong urge to pet every dog I meet. I like to dance, but I don’t need to party. I can be convinced to go for a walk, but the thought of making an hour-long hiking trip gives me the creeps. My favorite vegetable is spinach. When I’m sick, the person who’s taking care of me usually ends up annoyed because I’m an exhausting patient.”

Emily is sure she saw Aubrey’s lips quirking up the slightest.

“And I’d give up the fame yesterday if that’s what it takes to have you. I’m in love with you Aubrey, I think I have been for a long time now and I can’t pretend that I’m not anymore.”

Fresh tears have formed in Aubrey’s eyes and they’re trickling down as she laughs sadly and sniffs.

“I love you too,” she whispers. “God knows I’ve tried to suppress this but it’s not working and I’m so fucking scared that we’ll loose us over everything that is.”

Aubrey gesticulates around them and Emily knows what she means. Aubrey’s life. Her life. How they could merge them and how this will work out. She stands there for another few seconds and watches Aubrey, who leans against her door, exhausted from the lack of sleep and crying.

“Let’s just go to bed, beautiful. Tomorrow, we’ll have breakfast in this small house you own and make a plan.”

“Technically, it’s already tomorrow.”

Emily smiles. “Shut up.”

She steps in and takes Aubrey’s hand, pulling the blonde with her upstairs. When they settle down and Aubrey pulls up the sheets to cover them both, Emily holds her close and kisses the crown of her head.

_\- No I can’t sleep until I feel your touch -_


End file.
